How To Set New Year Goals That You Will Achieve
How to set New Year goals that you will achieve and that will make you happier and more fulfilled? Well, in the personal growth community there is a lot of talk at this time of the year about setting goals and achieving things, but since I have been giving the Emotional intelligence workshops I have seen that the "emotions" part is unfortunately and usually out if the equation. All of our decisions are based around our emotions. Everything that we do is either to avoid pain or to experience the pleasure and emotional fulfilment. When it comes to setting goals, writing down things like more exercise, changing the diet, achieving our BIG dream... can be easy, but achieving it is a totally different thing. Statistics are showing that 92% of people quit their New Year's resolution in February itself! The reason: the pain that they experience while doing the actions steps in order to achieve their goals. I have also seen in my work as a life coach that many of my clients have been setting professional goals for many years, but never personal goals. If we miss the personal goals part we end up being successful, or even rich, but... unfulfilled and unhappy if we neglected our relationships, self care, health, and emotional wellbeing. In this blog post I want to help you to set goals that you will not drop of by the end of February, and that will make you happier in the year to come! So, let's begin...
How To Set New Year Goals That You WILL Achieve
Look around yourself. One year from now you may change, your life may change, people around you may change. You may be interested in doing different things, your workplace may be different, your business may be different, your home or your boss may be different. The only constant thing in life is - change. Change is neither good or bad it’s what we take from it and learn from it.
Do not enter in the new year with the sorrow of everything that has happened to you this year, but with life lessons learned and knowing and trusting that things which bothered you anymore CAN change for the better, and some things surely WILL change.
In this blog post I am going to guide you trough the process of setting professional, personal, and noble goals, and at the end I will give you some motivation hacks to help you merge the action steps with the pleasure instead of pain, so that you can persist with your goals throughout the year. Don't forget while setting goals to set the SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Time-framed) goal: define it in a concrete way. Being rich is not a goal - earning 10K$ per month is. For example if your goal is to "earn more money", earning 10$ more will probably not make much of a difference in your life just like for example losing 1 kg of weight. So, be very specific with setting your goals, give them the time frame of a year, break them into smaller chunks if needed (for example loosing 5 kg, writing two blog posts, completing one chapter of a book... every month) and then make sure that you also write the actions steps that you are going to take to achieve your goals. Also, decide a reward for yourself when you reach your goals, something BIG and exciting which will be motivation enough o you to persist in your journey. Before setting your goals for the next year, make sure to reflect on the year behind! I will share with you my own New Year goal setting and year in review ritual, to help you do the same.
REFLECTING ON THE YEAR BEHIND (SUCCESS, FAILURES, LIFE LESSONS LEARNED)
The New Year ritual that I am doing for last ten years has helped me a lot to set my goals and successfully achieve them, as well with my self development. I do not celebrate New Year's Eve for last ten years in a party style, as I love to spend the night contemplating on the year behind and setting goals for the year to come, while sipping champagne and listening some good chill music. Now, if you do celebrate with it in a party style that is totally OK, and you can still do this ritual a night before, or a week, or day before the New Year's Eve, with a glass of wine, or a cup of good tea or coffee. My New Year goal setting ritual consists of self reflection and journaling prior to setting the goals for the year to come. First of all, you want to reflect on the the best moments of the year behind you. To do so, write down the answers to the following questions:
What were the happiest moments of the past year? What were the most memorable experiences and things you are most grateful for in the year behind? What things did you learn this year? How did you grow professionally and as a human being? What were your biggest achievements this year and things that you are most proud of yourself for completing, learning, and accomplishing? What was your biggest contribution to other people's lives in the year behind? In what way did you inspire, help, support, and improved lives of other people in your life, your work, and in your community?
After doing this self reflection, it is time to contemplate on your failures, difficult moments or sad and tragic events you have been trough, in order to let go of it, forgive yourself and other people who have hurt you, and carry on the importance life lessons into the new year. Write down what were your biggest failures and the most difficult moments in the year behind? What important life lessons did you learn from these experiences? How these experiences have changed you as a person? What can you do or change in your life next year in order to avoid repeating same mistakes or hurting situations next year? Is there anything that you wanted to achieve but you did not or could not? What are your biggest regrets about the last year? Is there anything that you think you could have done better or give a try and you didn't? Are there any goals that you have set for yourself in this time last year and you could not accomplish them? If yes, contemplate for a moment what could have been the reason you did not? Do you still want to pursue those goals and recycle them as new New Year's resolutions or you feel that it is not something that you still truly desire?
Happiness goals: to wake up every day inspired, love and be loved and desired, stay motivated and fired to fulfil our life purpose, serve with our gifts to the world, learn form the lessons called mistakes and setbacks and turn them into opportunities, find the inner piece and connection with what we may call God, Source, or else. Live life with no regrets on our death bed, but with memories that were worth living and legacy left that is worth remembering.
SETTING YOUR PERSONAL NEW YEAR GOALS
Personal goals are set with the intention to achieve objectives that will result in the betterment of yourself and your life. They include your self development and spiritual growth, health goals, and relationship goals.
You can use the questions below to set your personal goals for the New Year: What are the things that you want to improve or change about yourself in the New Year? What are the things that you want to learn or master in the New Year? What are the life changes that you want to make in the New Year in order to feel more happy and fulfilled in your life? What are the experiences that you want to have in the New Year (for example visiting certain places, traveling to particular destinations, reading certain books, doing some fun or new activities...?). What are the habits that no longer serve you that you want to let go of in the New Year? What are your health goals for the New Year (for example reducing X amount of weight, eating more greens, drinking more water, regular exercise...). What are your relationship goals? Do you want to improve any of your relationships? Do you want to be more social and attend more parties or invite people over to your home more often for dinner? Do you want to let go of certain toxic relationships or go out more often to meet new fiends, or potential romantic partner, or to spend more time with your partner (if in relationship)? Do you need to forgive to someone who has hurt you in the past?
What are your spiritual goals (anything that will help you in spiritual awakening and attaining the inner piece, like meditation, prayer, yoga, learning the spiritual knowledge, occult knowledge... Spiritual goals can also include reading spiritual books, attending certain workshops or signing up for coaching programs or yoga retreats, traveling to pilgrimage, manifesting with the Moon, connecting to Nature more, connecting to certain God or Goddess, chanting certain mantras, pulling the oracle cards, the inner self-discovery work... or whatever else will help you to tune into whatever the world "spiritual-ity" means to you.
Spiritual goals are the foundation of the other goals as only with a peaceful mind, knowing thyself, and cultivating the inner strenght we can achieve the balance in life.
You would not believe how many super-successful highly paid women sign up for life coaching with me, due to feeling torn apart by stress and deeply unfulfilled in their life. That's what it is really important to the the inner self discovery work to discover what are our true desires and soul calling, life purpose... and to cultivate the piece of mind and balance our mind and body with regular meditation and spiritual practice (whatever rituals we chose it be). Even if we achieve everything we wanted but we lose ourselves and our happiness, piece of mind, and health in the process... what is the purpose? Is it even worth it?
SETTING YOUR PROFESSIONAL & MONEY GOALS
Professional goals are objectives that will help you to be more successful at the work that you do and progress in your career. They can also include the amount of money you want to make, and any skill development that you need to master in order to grow professionally in your field, or to grow your business.
What are your career goals for the next year? Money goals? Skillset and professional growth goals? For example - do you want to learn new language or a skill, or attend a training that could help you grow in your career or your business? Do you want to work with a mentor or a coach or enrol in particular coaching program? Where do you see yourself or your business in the end of the next year? What are the things that you will commit doing in order to boost your career (or business) and your income? What are your financial goals for the year to come? Do you want to save certain amount of money or invest the certain amount of money in your career goals or in your business or passive income stream? Do you want to change your job, make the transition in your career, or start a new business? Write down all the goals and intentions for the next year when it comes to your career/business, finances, and professional growth.
SETTING your NOBLE GOALS
Noble goals are goals that are infused with an intention of living our life's higher purpose and making a positive and helpful contribution and impact in the world or in our community. Noble goals are the goals of our personal contribution to the world and making the positive impact with our gifts and the work that we are doing, generosity, charity, and leaving a legacy in our life.
Noble goals are important to set, as one of the basic six psychological human needs is - contribution! No matter how much money we make, how successful career we build... we will not feel truly fulfilled in life without the sense of pursuing our life's purpose or making the positive contribution in the world. As a life coach, I witness this so many times when women who are on C-level management positions or running very successful online businesses (while making lot of money, some even working on the beach in Bali or while traveling the world) sign up for life coaching with me because they feel they are not truly fulfilled in their life - even if they have achieved everything that they ever wanted!
That's why it is important that we set noble goals for the year to come. Your noble goals will depend of your own unique life purpose, gifts, talents, financial situation, and the amount of power or influence that you have within your workplace, career, community... They may include financial aid to someone or some NGO with a noble cause, or they may include you volunteering certain amount of hours in a week for a good cause, or you donating the money to trusted NGO with a good cause that you want to support, or even daily actions like supporting small business owners, organic farmers, preserving the tradition of your country, creative people and artists... by investing money in their products and services. Our noble goal can even be deciding to put more effort in preserving the environment and Mother Earth - going more green, carrying a tote bag, using eco-friendly cleaners, buying more organic food produce, donating money to wild animals sanctuaries, and stuff like that...
If you are not sure what could be your noble goals, I encourage you to contemplate on the things that really matter to you or something painful that you have been trough and think on how you can help other people who are going trough the same thing. Ten years ago, I was severely depressed and unhappy. It was psychotherapy and yoga, diving into spirituality and self development that have spiritually, emotionally, and even physically "brought me back to life". That was the reason I was so passionate in last ten years to help the people who are struggling in life, without sense of purpose, fulfilment or self belief. If I contemplate today, all of my noble goals so far were centred around that. I was giving free yoga classes in local yoga studio, I was volunteering as a translator for English language whenever some spiritual teacher would come to my home town to teach and pass on the spiritual wisdom, I was writing articles and blog on vegetarianism and healthy lifestyle for two years for free, I also wrote many articles in last three years and posts on this blog with life advice, that can help to other people be happier and rebuild their crushed self worth.
Similarly, if you went trough a certain disease, life challenge, addition recovery... is there anything that you can do to help others who are in similar situation, or knowledge you can share with others via writing a blog or a book or starting a YouTube channel? Is there any knowledge, skill, experience, or advice that you can share with others, which could help other people and make their life more inspiring, beautiful, richer, meaningful, happier...? Can you give a motivational or educational speech on some important topic in your community? Can you volunteer for some good cause in your community or donate some of your money?
I have to address one very important topic about the noble goals. Noble goals are self-less and they evolve around people you do not know without expectation of getting something back in return. For example, if you donate money to the charity you will not expect that those homeless people or children without parental care give you that money back one day, love you, or marry you. But, when we give in our relationships expectations are always there, and with expectations comes disappointment if they are not met. Relationships are based on mutual giving and receiving, otherwise they are not heart centred and genuine - someone is being taken taken advantage of. You need to be very clear about setting healthy boundaries in your relationships. If you want to help someone that you know, contemplate on how much you can give without sacrificing your own wellbeing and will you feel disappointed if that person does not return the favour one day? In other words, setting noble goals should not look like - there are these people who are taking advantage of me, so I should let them do so even more - because I'm a good person and I want to help to EVERYONE.
Also, remember that no matter how rich and powerful you can be you still cannot help to everyone! Mother Theresa devoted her entire life to helping people - she did not have a regular job, kids, and family responsibilities or home to take care of. She lived in a monastery and she was helping people full time, and still she was not able to help to everyone, but to a certain group of people. She also founded a sisterhood and others joined her in the mission, so again - she was not alone helping to - "everyone". So, be aware of how much you can give from the heart, whether you want to donate your time, money, knowledge, skills, pro bono work, inspirational and helpful content and advice on social media or your blog... without burning yourself out mentally, emotionally, and financially, because I assume if you're reading this you are not living in monastery and you have responsibilities, home, job, family... to take care of!
MOTIVATION HACKS TO KEEP YOU YOUR WILLPOWER STRONG THROUGHOUT THE YEAR
Before setting the particle goal, contemplate on your WHY. Why that amount of money is important to you, why do you want to start and/or grow your business, why you want to travel to that particular destination or have a certain life experience, why do you want to lose weight, eat healthier, or meditate...? Having your WHY in mind will help you persist. Even if your goals are "materialistic" like earning more money or a new home or a car, or luxury travel... there is always an emotion behind it called happiness and the state of mind called freedom! It is not about the money - it's about the freedom (to travel, to afford beautiful things, to have more time...) and so on. Running our own business "why" is also about the freedom - to make our own decisions, to be our own boss, to work while traveling, be able to sleep extra hours... and so on. Losing weight is also about feeling of freedom to wear the clothes we like, feeling confident, being healthier and more energetic to perform daily activities or play with children...
Behind every goal there is a pleasant FEELING of happiness, fulfilment, and joy, that we want to feel, and the pursuit of our personal FREEDOM. Think about the ways achieving your goal would make you feel happier and give you more freedom in life.
Whenever your motivation drops down, remember your WHY - it will help you to keep going. The second motivation jack is to give your goals exciting name. I usually forbid my clients who have goals of losing weight to call the exercise and workout - "exercise" because it sounds painful and hard, and they have negative association with it. I suggest them to rename it as "body movement", or "dancing every day", or "relaxing in the pool"... Then it sounds much more exciting and they are much more motivated. It is incredible how our brain responds differently to certain words! So, make sure that your goals have such an exciting name that when you think of them you feel ignited with motivation and very much inspired to take action!
Also, it is important that you chose the most exciting action steps as possible for you, which are matching your interests, skills, and interests the most. Change is anyway painful - don't make it more painful by setting goals with action steps that are PAINful! Set your goals in a way that you will be inspired to pursue them - that will give you motivation to persist.
My life coaching clients usually tell me that I make the change easy for them. It is because I help them to set goals and achieve them in such a way that they feel HAPPY, INSPIRED and EXCITED to work on them, not drained, exhausted, disappointed, forced...
For example, if you want to exercise more in the next year, and you hate going to the gym, writing a goal of going to the gym three times a week will be very painful for you to achieve and most probably you will drop of in February itself, or even sooner. Think about what are the "body movement" activates that you enjoy doing and chose them instead. If you like to dance, then dance classes or Zumba fitness would be perfect for you, as you would feel much more motivated to go dancing three times in a week, than working out in the gym.
If you are having a vision board, I suggest that you make a vision board for the year. If you have just a vision board, then you are not committing to live and experience and achieve all the thins in the next year, but someday... and that someday may be never. It becomes your fantasy board! If you make the vision board for the year, then you will PUSH yourself to COMPLETE and EXPERIENCE everything from that vision bard in the next year itself! You will give it a timeframe!
You can also chose a mantra or one word which you will keep on your vision board or write daily in your planner to remind yourself on your vision and focus for the year, like for example RICH, SPIRITUAL, I AM ENOUGH, I LOVE MYSELF, I AM WORTHY, SUCCESS(FUL), MONEY MAGNET, ABUNDANCE, PIECE, ADVENTURES, GROWTH, light, spirit, confidence, brave, love, healthy...
One of the most effective tools for achieving goals for me and my clients has been a daily panner, as a part of the morning ritual. When we start our day with FOCUS, goals we need to accomplish, gratitude, and self care notes and affirmations, that's where the magic happens! I would suggest that you use the daily planner every morning to start your day in a powerful way, with focus and clarity on your goals and INTENTION, which is the foundation of the Law Of Attraction, and our brain's focus during the day. It will help you to be more productive, build mindset for success, take care of yourself better, achieve more things, and get clear on your priorities! As this is a season of giving, I decided to give out the daily planner which I'm using and giving to my coaching clients to you for free! You can download it by clicking on the button at the end of the blog post.
Working with a life coach can help you not only to achieve your goals, but also to improve your overall well-being, resilience, and reduce stress, anxiety and depression (as confirmed in rigorous Psychology research studies, performed by Anthony Grant, Ph.D. director of the Coaching Psychology Unit of the School of Psychology, University of Sydney). Life coach can help you achieve much more in less time, than if you would do it on your own (statistics from the American Society for Training and Development provide insight that a person’s probability of achieving a goal increases from 50% to 95% when one has a coach/mentor to keep the him/her accountable and helps putting the idea and plan into action!). Did you know that Oprah Winfrey states that one of the reasons she is so successful is working with her life coach Martha Beck for over 20 years? One of the things that I hear often from my life coaching clients is that they have achieved more in six months of working with me, than on their own on years. That is the power of having someone to keep you accountable and having an expert to give you the right strategy and action steps that can help you to achieve your goals faster and greater.
If you want to really work and achieve your goals in the next year, and change your life for the better, achieve deep inner transformation in order to become the better version of yourself, happier version of yourself, more confident version of yourself... click on the button at the end of the post to read about the life coaching program via Skype. and download your free gift- daily planner.